Hi folks!

My Story -TW baby loss

Hello there, I’m Anna. I’m in my mid-twenties, and was born in Oxford, England.  I moved to Belfast, NI when I was 18 to study Drama at QUB.  I graduated a few years later with a 1st and got engaged a week later.  I’m now married with a little boy called Alfie and two angel babies.  My passions outside of my doula work are travelling, Disney and music, playing, singing, writing and listening!  My day job is a Chaplain in family homelessness centres, and so caring for others is my everyday.  I have found my passion for antenatal education and postnatal care, through having Alfie, and experiencing the pressures that healthcare staff are under, and how it is truly translating into their direct patient care. 

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I fell pregnant shortly after getting married.  We were surprised and ecstatic that this had happened so fast, as we had concerns due to family history.  A few weeks after those two lines showed up, I was at home and experienced a real pain in the side of my groin.  After trying various things to ease it, we decided to head to hospital, on the 11th night, of all times!  After waiting and waiting, it was discovered that the pregnancy was not where it was supposed to be.  It was an ectopic pregnancy, meaning our baby was growing in my fallopian tube rather than the womb.  This meant a few days in hospital and with expectant management, I passed our first baby in hospital; we called her Aurelia.

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Just a few months later, in September 2022, I found out I was pregnant again.  I was petrified.  We had lots of early scans and a lot of ‘scanxiety’ before each, especially being so close after our ectopic pregnancy. Thankfully, all was ok with this pregnancy and I went on to deliver Alfie in May 2023.  My waters broke first, with no contractions for nearly 24 hours, so I was induced with a pessary and went on to have a water birth and minimal intervention.  I had one stitch, immediately breastfed and we went home later the next day.  Alfie is a happy, thriving little boy and is my pride and joy.

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In August 2024, I found out I was pregnant again.  Due to the first ectopic meaning we are more likely to experience this again, we had more early scans. This pregnancy wasn’t ectopic, but unfortunately at our 3rd early scan, around 8 weeks, we found out there was no longer a heartbeat. This was a missed miscarriage, in which my body did not pass the baby naturally, as it did with the ectopic.  I was given my options, and wanted desperately for my body to do it's thing.  After waiting with no progress, I found myself making decisions I didn’t want to make and struggling mentally and physically with what we were going through.  I was also still caring for Alfie, of course, and desperately wanted to make sure he didn’t notice any changes.  With some medical intervention, I passed our 3rd baby at home; we named her Talia.

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With going through pregnancy after loss, and then giving birth to Alfie, I found that there was such a lack of time and care from midwives and health visitors as they are under such stress themselves, that I really had to rely on my family for support.  This is something I know I am so fortunate to have had, but with my awareness in my day job, I am so attuned to this not being everyone's experience.  I decided I wanted to be other people’s support in such an important yet difficult time. I was blessed by my sister-in-law who had babies several years ago, and went through some trials in her postpartum period.  My sister in law knew the right things to say and do that truly helped me to enjoy my postpartum period more, especially in the early days. But I also became all too aware of how lonely maternity leave can be and how isolated you can feel.  I do not want anyone else to feel that they don’t have anyone to rely on or talk to.  And so I trained as a postnatal doula, focusing on the postnatal period and finding a passion for assisting others going through pregnancy, birth and postpartum after loss.  Although this is my primary interest, I will am also passionate about birth outcomes and women being empowered in their birthing journey.  Therefore, I have also a focus in antenatal education, with a broad spectrum of topics, ranging from feeding, to car seat safety. 

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I trained with Younique Postnatal Education, and learned so much about the physiology of birth and the postnatal period, the emotions, the practicalities, the many options, warning signs, breastfeeding, formula feeding, sleep and much more. This allowed me to discover so many nuances about the postnatal period and has given me the knowledge to tailor my services to each family as necessary.

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For our final task, we had to research a topic we were passionate about and create resources we could use in practice. This project allowed me to discover the niches that belong to those going through pregnancy after loss, and find passion in walking alongside those families. If that is you, firstly know you are not alone in this walk and you are so loved. Secondly, you have found a compassionate and empathetic doula that will work with you so you get the support you need in this difficult time.

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I am so looking forward to working with you and your family, in the biggest transitional time of your lives.  So please get in touch via my contact form, email or my social medias, so we can get started on your journey!